Bagels’n’Bits. Episode 1.

(I originally wrote the first 6 episodes of Bagels’n’Bits in 2008. I’m just copy/pasting here, planning on new content soon. Any “current” info is going to be horrifically out of date. For instance… I was in school for massage therapy at the time of this writing.)

Hello, and welcome to “Bagels ‘n’ Bits”. We’re here today to talk about useless information. Is it really useless? Or does it actually come in handy at times? I say… It can’t hurt. I’ve racked up quite the mental library of absurdly useless facts, and I’ve decided to share them with you, the listeners. Perhaps, if I transfer this knowledge to you, it might leave my head and make room for some important facts… like the names of all of the muscles in the body that I’ll have to learn this fall.

Anyway… On with the show. 

1200px-Nine-banded_Armadillo.jpgBy – Own work, CC BY 3.0,

They say that the very beginning is a very good place to start. So, we’ll go ahead and use armadillos for the first episode. Armadillos… You know those amazingly abnormal armored animals one might find dead along a Florida freeway? Yes. Them. They are nearly always born as identical quadruplets. An interesting fact, for sure. But not nearly so interesting as the fact that almost 5% of these foursomes of not-so-furry creatures actually carry “Mycobacterium leprae”. Yes, folks. That is leprosy. Armadillos are, in fact, quite prone to carry the disease, due to their lower-than-human body temperatures. Especially in their feet and noses. But don’t worry too much. It is only transmitted to humans through bodily fluids, especially nasal discharge. So, as long as you can steer clear of armadillos with colds, I think you’re pretty safe. Still, you’d hate to become one of those 2.4 million on earth with the dreaded disease, so I’d refrain from getting within 10 feet of one, personally.

And now… a word from our sponsor.

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About BagelWoman

I'm a Browncoat-wearing Trekkie with a soft spot for Evil Willow and a thing for mad men with blue boxes.
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